Im crying now as i type this... Im so upset i feel upset to the core! why is this... Additional Details I had cancer in 2005 im 22 now.. i hate the way i look... i hate most things . god ...
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First of all, no bashing, no one here wants to read your close-minded ignorance, if you do post and bash, i WILL report you....and then....i might just eat you...0_o
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help291250
Am i depressed or just weak minded?
hi. im 22 years old and have never had a gf,and never really even had a girl interested in me that i have liked. it seems i always fall straight into the friend wagon, never the boyfriend. this has made me lose self confidence to the point where i really dont see myself picking up ever again! lately I have been getting really depressed about it, especially when i have mates talking about going out with a girl or taking them home, something i can't relate to but wish i could! I am quite ugly and do understand why most girls aren't really into me (short, overweight, pale, freckles, bad scar across my nose, bad teeth, very hairy back and chest...etc). I have contemplated suicide, and lately i have been wishing I had a terminal illness so I could die without any guilt laid on my family. I am too embarassed to talk to anyone i know about it, mainly cos i feel like im just whinging....i play guitar, have a well paid job, my own house, car and motorbike, just missing someone to share it with!
you are not a weak minded, indeed based on your story, you are quite depressed. Since you know your weak points, why not have a make over? Try to lose weight or go seek a medical advice for your freckles or visit a dermatologist, there they can give remedies for your scar too, to at least diminish it. Don't lose hope. You have a great life! And you knew it! You have what others don't have, such as good job, house, car and hmm... you know how to play guitar which girls like. May be the right girl for you is not yet coming but in due time, she will come in a manner your don't expect. Just pray for it. And don't ever think again to commit suicide, it's unforgivable sin. Think positive and look at life in a brighter side! Good luck!
Kate
It does sound like you are depressed and should see a psychiatrist about it. Another thing to do is do something for yourself that makes you feel good about yourself and try to think positively about yourself at all times. Its been proven that positive thinking causes positive results. Also, don't worry about girls so much, there is someone for everyone, in fact possibly multiple someones. It sounds like you have everything else going for you, all you need to do is start feeling better about yourself. People with self confidence attract other people to themselves. Just try thinking positivly about yourself for a week and see how it changes things. It sounds like you would be a catch, and you should think so too!
grandmasweetcake
Sounds as though you have a problem with self esteem, I've also been there, done it. I believe God has someone for everyone.
Ask God or the universal consciousness to send the one he created just for you. Ask, sincerely and begin to actually feel the happiness and how you would feel if she were already there with you. Know in your heart that this miracle cannot, not happen and that your prayers have been answered and are on there way. Don't go looking for someone. The more intense the feelings of joy and happiness you feel as though she is there with you now, the quicker the universe or God will manifest her in your life. Wake up every morning thankful and thank God, or the universe continually for all that you have. Visualize what she will look like, think about her, visualize her riding in the car with you and lying next to you even though she is not there at the moment. Quantum Physics has pr oven that this is how the universe works. They call it the law of attraction. It can get pretty heavy when the get into how thought creates matter and how it comes back to you. This should stop any depression that you are having. This works for everyone through the thought process.
Gottaloveher
Why don't you get your teeth fixed and try to get in shape? No girl wants to put her mouth on lips that barely cover a mouthful of odor and bad teeth. What are you thinking? If you have the job and money, etc. surely you can do something about improving yourself. Right. Or are you just lazy? In that event then you don't deserve a girl. I mean just who do you think you are to be so repelling and not even trying to improve yourself.....just expect people to feel sorry for you and give you some leg or something just because you have a job!!!! You really need to take a long look at yourself and get with the program. YEAH.
gonecrazytoday
As Ron White would say you can fix ugly. Since you have a well paying job fix it. This will do more for your self esteem and then you will be equipped to go get them. Suicide is a wusses way out. Enjoy life get the make over and boost the self esteem. I'm ugly and fat no teeth, wish I had hair on my chest, scars on my face from over 600 stitches from a car accident and no money, no well paying job, no motorbike can't play guitar but I'm happy with who I am.
mary
well your defiantly depressed. maybe you fall into the friends catagory because of how you feel about yourself. self confindence would surely help, girls pick up on stuff like that. you should also talk to someone about how you are feeling, hurting yourself isnt the answer. lots of girls like guys who play guitar and defiantly all your other pluses like a job, house, and car. and all at the age of 22. wow id say your friends need a wake up call.
dan2lee2
hey istead of thinking of all the bad things that happened to u or something that ur not proud of ....... think of the stuff that makes u ... you ............ be happy with wat u hav then u will find true happyness in u......... and hey u have a motorcycle that i wanted in my whole life hahahah ( me so jealous) welll dont think of suicide ......... then ur just being selfish,,,,,,,,,,,, and also loseing wieght is not that hard,,,,,,,,,, i lost 20lb i used to be 180 and now am 160 lb yeah......... and im olny 16 so ........../ its more easier for fat people to lose wieght than regular people
elysian fields
Look at all that you have. and all that you can and have accomplished. Give yourself some credit, man. you're alright. You're just fine. get some confidence. Keep your chin up, dude. You are too hard on yourself. WAY too hard. smile more often. get counseling. share with your best friend. What you really need to get for yourself is some patience. Your high expectations are messing with your mood big time. Patience, my brother..patience and confidence. Lots of handsome guys have the same problem.
philbertpheinstein
Explain all that in about a dozen personal ads and you might get lucky. Meantime, fix what you can. Stop being overweight! Get your teeth fixed! Make the most of what you have..
Cougar
When you feel good on the inside ,it shows on the outside. Make a list on a piece of paper the things you don't like about yourself. Number them from 1- ? with #1 being the most important. And solve your problems 1 by 1 starting with the most important. Being short you can't do nothing about. Being overweight you need to eat healthy and exercise. Being pale go to the tanning beds or lay out in the sun. Freckles will fade with age. Scars are called man tattoos. Guys get tattoos to make them look tough. But,if you have scars you don't need tattoos. For the teeth go to the denist and ask him about venears. My son had bad teeth and he was afraid to smile. He has venears now and his teeth look like a movie stars teeth. for the hair on your skin and back you can get a wax. It pulls your hair out by the roots. I suggest you only do it to your back because guys with no hair on their chest look gay. I just taught you and solved all of your problems in 5 minutes.
Laura
Work on making yourself feel good about you first. When a girl sees a confident guy who is happy with a good attitude, that is VERY attractive. You don't have to be gorgeous, just have a good attitude. It's great that you have made so many accomplishment early in life, but girls aren't just looking for material things either. It sounds like you have a lot going for you, now you just need to work on you. Good luck, we have all been in a position in life were we aren't in love with ourselves, but we have to figure out what will pull us out of that state.
Rune, the Ice Lady
You ARE depressed, not a weak-minded.
Swingline
Yeah brother...i wouldn't say you are weak minded, it sounds more like frustration. which leads to depression.
I can relate on some grounds and i can see that some things have to change. Either you start doing things that you love to do in life or you got to do what you got to do if you want a girlfriend. Change your life style. and you may and definitely have the choice of fixing your self up with what money can provide you with.
AussieGal777
Look. You have accomplished so much in your life and you are only 22!!!!
You say you want a girl, well heres some tips
You say you are overweight,pale,freckles,bad scar, bad teeth, hairy back and chest.
Dude. Technology these days is AMAZING.
Overweight- join a gym, youll meet girls there and lose weight
Pale- hit the beach
Freckles- WHO CARES!
bad scar- who cares
Bad Teeth- SEE THE DENTIST
Hairy back and chest- WAXING, LASER HAIR REMOVAL ETC.
The answers are right infront of you
save up a few grand and spend it on yourself to get transformed.
Girls are pretty shallow, they go for looks before personality, but you have the money so just go ahead and make some enquiries.
Dont EVER contemplate suicide,
You sound like a great guy!!
Just take my advice and the ladies will come running lol
Your life isnt worth ruining just because you have a lack of self confidence. goodluck hun
:)
**Jay's Girl**
that is a very sad story, your not weak minded but it wouldnt be so bad to try and have a little self confidence. Write down all the positive things you have achieved regarding your job and your guitar etc. keep those things in mind!
also set yourself little goals such as loosing weight, maybe get your teeth fixed, get your back waxed, go to the gym for a some exercise or go for a walk everyday, exercise releases certain endorphins which make you happier.
work a little on yourself and your self esteem, no one can love you if you dont love yourself. even go talk to a councellor if your that down. but dont quit before even trying!
goodluck!
email me if you like
copy^cat
well you can't have everything. go to the gym to make you feel better about how you look. but you don't have to be good looking to get a gf. you just need a good attitude. no girl wants to be with someone insecure.
Jay15539
Hey man, you just need to have a more positive outlook on situations. Nobody should be embarrased about the way they look. If you have a well paid job, then you can afford to get your teeth fixed up looking perfect. Having freckles doesn't make anyone ugly. Hairy back and chest can be solved in less than 5 minutes. And there is always time to lose alot of weight if you're worried about that, especially since you're only 22 years old. Scars look cool in my opinion and I always thought girls dig scars. I have previously gone through depression past times in my life only to realise that my reasoning behind being depressed was stupid as hell. All you need to do is be more open minded.
Sherri S
Try working on the things you don't like about yourself to help boost your self esteem. Go to a gym or even just ride a bike, walk instead of drive (when possible), go up and down stairs...anything even if it's minor. The smallest change in your physical activity can make a difference especially because you are still young.
If you have the money, go to a salon (yes straight guys do go!) and get waxed (if you can stand the discomfort) and get a new hair style. A new hair style can make a difference in the way you feel about yourself. See a dentist.
While you are doing these little things, focus on improving what you can. I know depression may cause you to avoid doing these things for yourself because it feels like you are drowning in self hatred. But if you really hope to find the right girl for you, you have to like yourself. Do whatever you are capable of to get to a place where you like yourself.
Once you feel even a little bit better about yourself, your change of attitude will show! Girls will notice.....because it really is about the attitude. Girls can overlook things like looks easier then guys, in general. Girls dig the guy who is confident.....so work on becoming someone who You like.....then girls will like you too!!!
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