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Mental Chick
Should people with mental illness or addiction have children?
So you think it is morally and ethically correct for someone with a mental illness or an addiction to have children, when there is a chance they could pass on the trait/tendancy to this illness to the child?
If you are the child of someone with a mental illness, do you think your parents made the right desicison in having you?
If you suffer from depression or another mental illness, have you given thought to wether you should had children? Additional Details
I agree that any one who is still battling with an addiction should not have children, but what about recovering alcholics with several years sobriety?
This isn't a question about wether mentally ill people can care for children and be good parents, I'm interested to know if the should risk the genetic problems that could occour.
What a load of B******ks - addiction can creep up AFTER a person has had children.
lolo
its not wrong, but think of your children before going through with it. think about invetro fertilization--so that you can choose an ebryo qwithout the addiction or illness. but if you are senial, think about if you should eb raising children? im sorr, but you have to question it.
NONAME
FCORQ YOU
im a mental
my friends are mental
my bro is autistic,psychosis,ocd
i have ptsd for post,trauma,stress,disorder
i wasnt born with it
it comes from trauma
it cant be passed
mentals at one point were sterilized
this one gal who was a mental was raped
she got pregnant
and had a kid
the kid was fine in tip top shape
one might ask why did i say fcorq you?
was it necessary?
maybe not
but i find this highly offensive
it pisses me off
mental illnesses are nothing to be ashamed of
as if it was such an awful thing so repulsive such a horrid thing to have or pass onto another as if it were something to be ashamed of
about the parents thinking whether or not they made the right decision
my mother loves my mental brother
she wouldnt trade him for the world
mental illness is not necessarily a hindrance
my friend with adhd is brilliant
he says witty intelligent things
he has a big heart
ptsd has not hindered me as far as retardation
[definition of retarded to be hindered]
i was always gewd at math and science i was always above my grade level in math and science
no one has the right to judge the quality of life
if a person with something different about them
a "mental"wishes to have a child then they should be able to
thats a human right
even though mentals arent always regarded as humans
you wouldnt be able to tell i had ptsd if you saw me on the street
not all mental illness stick out
adhd,add,ptsd,ocd,mild autism,
you cant really tell if a person has one of those or not
go ahead have kids everyone has the right to pursue happiness
Chav Princess
No they shouldn't.
Munzir
You have me in knots and thinking!!
My answer is NO,I feel as an adult we should not mess up a innocent life...knowing very well our situation and even if the chances of a healthy child was 50-50.
To bring up an impaired or challenged child requires lot of inner strength,May God help them who have such children.
Luck n Cheers!
Onestep downfrom God
No. They should all be chemically castrated.
sara m
in the sense that the mental illness would pass on to there children then no they shouldn't have children.my parents(mostly my mom)had alot of mental illnesses. so here i am because of them i have to live my life with depression and bipolar and alot of other issues. but they shouldn't have had me but in that sense if all the "crazy" people stopped having kids the world would come to an end because most people have some sort of mental illness whether they know it or not.
dan k
Why is your name Mental chick?
paul m
I would say no, mainly over the questions raised about the ability to care for the child properly.
I know certain types of mental health problems can be helped by medication etc. and addiction can be beaten, but until such time as the illness is under control or addiction beaten then the potential parent should only consider the well being of any child.
Dazzit
A lot of people with mental illness and addictions, also have problems with being able to cope emotionally with stressful everyday situations and dealing with issues of responsibility.
Anyone in this situation apart from thinking about passing on traits, should be thinking very long and very carefully about one thing. "Will I be able to cope"
Reason being that these days, if Social Services get even a sniff that you are having trouble coping. They will take your baby away. Believe me when I say it doesn't take much evidence. When they take one, it gives them every justification to be waiting outside the delivery room with open arms when you have another.
I have personally witnessed my second grandson being taken away by 13 policemen, a riot van, four patrol cars, two hospital security guards and two social workers. Within six hours of birth.
The reason, his brother bumped his head and had a brain heamorhage in what was later found to have been an accident.
Once they have a child they very rarely give them back. They will and have taken children for no other reason than the fact that the parents have learning difficulties however loving and caring they are.
I haven't seen my first grandson in 18 months and my second in 9.
I point you in the direction of "FASSIT" on this. That is if you feel like getting morally and righteously angry.
On another personal note, I inherited most of the bad physical traits of both my parents. No I'm not ugly or considered disabled but I have been in a lot of physical discomfort all my life. My parents weren't to know and so I have no regrets.
I took the discision a long time ago not to pass these traits on to a child of my own. Instead I took on a ready made family and treated the children as my own. Even the oldest call me dad now which is reward enough.
Erika
My grandmother had depression and my mother has bipolar disorder and then there is me and my sister. I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and I do believe that my sister has it as well but she has never been diagnosed.
I am so happy to be here in this world and to have experienced the things that I have. I am very glad that my mother chose to have me. My mother wasn't the greatest that she could have been but she did her best and having bipolar disorder did not make her a bad mother.
Even though I have bipolar disorder, I am very good with psychology and medicine. I'm going to school for medicine and my passion is psychiatry. I'm very good with children and development. I will make an excellent mother and I do plan on having children of my own. I currently help with my boyfriends daughter, who I absolutely adore and my disorder has nothing to do with how she is raised by me.
There are SO many different types of mental illness that you can't just say no to all of them. Depression is so slight in comparison to schizophrenia so I think that should be a factor.
I do think that people who are addicts will always be addicts but if they have recovered then they should have children if they choose to. People who can't overcome their addictions shouldn't have children if they can help it but it's really no ones choice but their own.
serephina
I have suffered from bouts of clinical depression since my teens and also have a mild form of borderline personality disorder. I have a happy and healthy 9 year old son who I raised as a single parent till recently..every case is different.
BBq
If the mental illness is untreatable or the person is not willing to submit to good care, then it might be a very good thing to not have children. If on the other hand, the person is trying to get well and can become well and they are responsible about their condition, then it could be possible when they are on a good road and under good care. There are so many levels of mental illness that it is hard to say. So much just depends on the family history, the severity of the illness and the ability to control or cure the illness. The same is true for addictive behavior. I know people who have become well and have been able to go on to a full life with a family. I would hate to tell you or anyone to not have children without more complete info. A doctor should be consulted and not the general public. We might influence you in the wrong direction when this is really a question for a professional. As far as asking others if they feel they should be here, I would be careful in that as well. Each person has so much to offer. Even if they have needed special care, their being here has given someone a chance to care for them or to help them. Again, I think the first and last questions should be asked of a professional and by each person considering children. A blanket statement could influence and adversely affect a persons decision in the wrong way and deprive them of the wonder of having a child.
starlet108
But then is it morally and ethically correct for someone in effect to play God by telling people whether or not they can have kids. If you look realistically at this, I think you'll find that many sufferers of depression and some other mental problems did not develop these or were not diagnosed until later in their lives. Quite often its after kids are born, a house is mortgaged and the pressure is on that adults begin to break under the strain - often it takes just one trauma to tip the balance. Also, don't forget that it is sometimes the very fact that children are there that stops a person from going over the edge - my husband suffers manic depression in recent years and my daughters have got through to him at tmes when I couldn't - it was my youngest who eventually persuaded him to listen to me and go and get help. We now have a grandchild and its the best tonic for his depression - he is on medication and back to his happy, loving self. How would you determine at which point a person is deemed too mental to have children ?? Personally I dont think its feasible to stop them do you ????
evilangelfaery919
I'm sorry but I think everyone should be allowed to have children. And if you're worried about genetic implications then probably over 80% of the world shouldn't be reproducing. Mental illness isn't the only thing that's genetic. High blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes, arthritis, Alzheimer's, some cancers, birth defects, the list is endless. Every component of your body is linked to a genetic trait...and therefore almost every illness in existence is as well. I'm sure as heck glad my parents had me and we don't make the cut on multiple illnesses. We've got Alzheimer's, diabetes, schizophrenia and depression and anxiety disorders, alcoholism, high everything, heart disease, breast cancer, and a nifty pain disorder. Despite all that me and my sister and my cousins have turned out OK. We lead productive normal lives and are productive normal people. We don't look any different until you open our medical charts. My fiance's family carries the gene for early onset Alzheimer's, his grandmother and his father were both either vegetable or dead before 45. And even thought he worries everyday that he won't see our daughter down the aisle or that he's passed it on to her we both think it's worth it and take hope in the fact that it didn't touch his two aunts. And how are you going to tell who to cut off? My grandparents are free of mental illness and so are my aunts and uncles and my mom but then almost every single one of my cousins has a mental issue. Then on my dad's side my grandma had severe schizophrenia but my dad and aunt are passably normal. How do you know who carries the gene? How do you know whether it's recessive or dominant? You're suffering from severe delusions if you think you can genetically engineer the human race into not having diseases. It's not possible and you would cripple the entire essence of what we are in the attempt.
tania b
I have a mental illness (bi-polar),and yes I made the right choice having my two babies.When pregnant with my daughter I queried Dr's about hereditary chances and it"s not just that, and the fact is that there is no ground proof that it solely genetic. it is also other common denominators such as a persons childhood,and drugs.
I don"t take drugs as I don"t drink and personally I think I"m a dam good mother regarded the sigma around me. I give my children 16mths and 4mths the most loving environment, and yeah there father takes off sometimes and it"s me and our kids but not one bit of stress has reflected into my mothering. because they come first.
Katie
maybe.... it all depends
Spiny Norman
Many of our most famous artists, musicians, comedians, film stars, etc suffer from or have had mental illness. I think what you are asking is was Adolf Hitler right by exterminating all those that in his eyes were not 'perfect'. Mental Illness and depression is not always carried to the next generation. Most of the people who commit horrendous crimes are 'normal' the mentally ill are highlighted and too often easy targets and wrongfully imprisoned.
Nothing is perfect in this life.
tina c
Thank the lord for the constitution . The freedoms we have in America should never be taken for granted . There are countries that surgically remove a mentally ill persons ability to have children . The health care in our country is some of the best in the world , But public opinion does not always accept the fact that mental illnesses are treatable. If a person who is stuck with a ailment such as blindness or deaf this would never be an issue. I know first hand what it is like to have children in such a dilemma and I will never regret having had them......... And as far as addiction both of my parents were alcolholics . But this didn't make one of me. The history books also state that the personality types who migrated to this land had multiple mental issues to leave and go to a unknown land . We are the melting pot of a vast group of immigrants who may not necessarily have had all their bearings but we should keep in mind that you do not know if your will pass own these same traits to your child. Look at what the reign of Adolph Hitler and his followers would have wanted to create "a supreme race"......Mental health and addiction are treatable hopefully soon there will be health care made available to everyone with these serious conditions instead of the of the STIGMA and ignorance of so many . If the parents cannot be responsible for their own children that just means that the child should be awarded to those who can fulfil the proper care and development of the child. In other words , society must not take a blind eye to the welfare of them. Kids do reach out but listenening is a rare practice these days
last I would add mental illness can strike at any time in a person life and the same is true of addiction.............
Marvin's identitytheft
No, they shouldn't even be allowed to have friends because they might convince other people of their delusions.
I am one of those people too. I am yet to find a compassionate soul who'd want to sit down, listen to me, or even hug me when I am down. I think everyone is afraid that being with me or loving me might cause them to go insane. In the past three years, I haven't heard a friendly or a loving "I love you the way you are". My so-called friends just tell me to take the high road-- I obviously don't need love or acceptance.
If what I have is genetic, I would never put another soul through so much misery. I know how you feel.
In the past three years, I have been through more stress than seventy people do in a lifetime -- and I didn't turn into a sociopath killing people randomly. "Normal" people see me as a coward because I don't hurt others and so they love to laugh at me.
Even if my kid turns out to be "normal" by the worldly standard, I wouldn't want him to be in this world. He will only learn to victimize and label others in the name of act utilitarianism.
(The answerer next to me says that all the great thinkers had mental illness; how can people trust their knowledge to be authentic -- they were probably making assumptions according to their delusions? I see the "normal" people as a vicious, greedy lot who would use even a mental patient for their ulterior motives and criticize him nonetheless.)
BTW, Hitler encouraged his psychiatrists to diagnose everyone in the camps who was even a little different with some or the other mental-illness, so that they could be sent to the gas-chambers. Dr. Victor Frankl talks about this misuse of psychiatry in his book.
gmonte33
Many physical things like heart disease tend to run in families. Would you discourage these people from having children? If heart disease runs in your family you would educate your children about getting adequate exercise, eating a healthy diet, not smoking and getting cholesterol levels and blood pressure checked regularly. The same thing goes for people who have a family history of mental illness or addiction. With mental illness you educate your child about the particular disorder and learn to recognize early signs of it. The same with substance dependence. Not only do mental disorders or addiction problems run in families but many physical disorders do also. We just need to educate the kids about possible illnesses that they may develop through heredity. If breast cancer runs in your family then you educate your daughters on the importance on monthly self-exams and mammograms. If breast cancer runs in your family should we discourage them from having children? Please don't stigmatize mental illness any more than it already is.
lizbeyond1973
I was born with bipolar disorder... mild ocd to boot. My mom has it... my grand ma... and God knows how many others in my family. I am so glad to be alive. I suffered addiction as self medication before I was diagnosed. I have 12 years clean and four children I adore... non so far have my trait. I have also discovered that there are, for most people, natural ways to manage the illness. I thank my parents for life. I thank God for my kids... they give me the will to keep trying and to go on, and also I am grateful for the intellegence given me to learn how to live a joyous life dispite adversity.
honey... perhaps you need the support of those who understand your condition. Maybe, with just a little effort on your part, you can learn to manage it like I did. Maybe you need some spirituality to help you. Don't give up, and don't condemn women for needing children. It is, after all, part of our make up... and is the reson de et for more woman than will admit it.
It doesn't always pass down either. My sister, born from the same mentally ill mom is normal.
Try not to be so self indulgent as to blame all your problems on others. No one is perfect. Life is suffering wheather you're mentally ill or not. We all suffer. We all grow old... We all die...
Try to find your heart in the deep dark waters of your ailing soul... It's there... it can feel joy... it can feel love... it can share these feelings with others... it can!
Try again! Try harder! Be grateful for this chance in life. Use it to try to help others like you. Find your courage and move to make yourself better. You can!
With love and compassion,
lizbeyond1973
Miranda G
This is a very good question. I have thought about it a lot myself. I have a history of mental illness in my family and it affected me though I've been fighting hard. Such thoughts visit me very often and I have doubts. Although right now I am definitely positive about having a child and I wish it will be a girl because it's said they are more resistant to genetic conditions.
Turtle
If the mental illness or addiction is under control then yes. If not, and they cannot properly take care of the child then no. Traits are not always passed onto children and if so then you can help them deal with it as well.
This is only if the illness is not a very serious one as well but a common one like depression or OCD.
P S
logic would dictate that only those who are strong and healthy would have the most kids. But alas, logic does not apply to the human species. This is proven out by the simple observation that the size of the family is inversely proportional to the sanity and intelligence of the breeding pair.
Becci
I think it would depend on how bad your illness/addiction is.
Because of this you may not be able to provide/look after your child as best to your abilities and this child may end up in care/homeless etc.
I would say, get yourself better and have children when the times right, having an addiction usually makes a person very self centred and selfish, and this isn't a good thing to have when bringing a child up as they need you and your support 24/7 as they grow up, and if your suffering from an addiction its going to make it very difficult!
You may think that your getting better or feeling better at this moment in time, but do you know whether you'll still be like this in 5 years time?
80% of people suffering from a mental illness actually had a bad childhood or were abused or neglected growing up.
Having a mental illness is not necessarily passed on through your genes, but your child may pick up some of your traits, especially if your suffer from depression. If there is a family history of mental illness throught out your families generations again the chances are higher
Alcoholism can be passed through genes but is usually caused by that persons life experiences/stress, being an alcoholic doesnt also mean your mentally ill!!!!
Concentrate on yourself first, then your future!
take care x
athina68
its a very good question but i think i cant answer it
i think it depends of the illness or the disease they have and the partners .
silverrubberband689
My dad is both an addict and has mental illnesses. This just gives me an example of what not to be like when i move out of the house (i'm 17). I dont know if my parents made the right decision, but i consider myself to be a good person, and i do dislike my father immensely, but if i wasnt born, where the hell else would i be. So this is kind of a difficult question for me...
jadedlibra73
yes, may people have healthy children and lives while suffering with depression and other illnesses
as for addictions, it all depends on the addiction..
The best is yet 2 come.........
surely there are much worse physical illness that can be inherited than mental health. i can understand your reasoning but you have come across a little harsh no one should be denied children no matter what health problems they have. i have not had children and dont want any cos i have enough coping with myself at times and therefore feel it would be unfair on the child. but i would NEVER agree mentally ill people cant have children
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